I know you know that
things have been absolutely crazy and my life has completely turned upside
down! For the better of course, I am so in love with this little girl! When
people told me that I would never truly know what love was until I had a child,
were so right. I never thought that I could love someone so much that it
physically hurts!
I'll take you back to April the day before the surgery.... My dad's flights ended up getting SOOO delayed, almost a full 48 hours delayed, but he made it! My mom's flight got in on time so at least I knew that one parent was going to make it! My poor dad was so frustrated... it was a long story and so many things have happened since that I don't really remember all of the details, but he was super delayed and I was so sad to have less time with him, but I am so grateful that they both made it to see their grandchild be born!
Here is me leaving for the hospital! And my last bump picture!
The delivery went so smoothly, everything went very well. We weren't scheduled for a time slot on the Saturday that she was born, but we
were told to come in at 7:30am and from there I was placed into a waiting
hospital room called Triage. Dad, mom, and Dan got to wait with me. I pretty
much just sat there in the hospital bed until they were ready for me in the OR.
It ended up being about a 4 hour wait from the time I got to the hospital to
the time I was taken into the OR… they had a few emergencies that they had to
tend to before they were able to take care of me since I wasn't an emergency I
got kind of pushed to the back burner, it was ok cause I was able to calm my
nerves a little bit before I went in. They prepped me and got me completely
ready to cut and then they brought Daniel into the room. He looked SO
nervous, the poor guy. But I calmed him down a little bit. I was very relaxed
and told him that if I wasn't just about to have a baby, I could totally take a
nap. Once he saw how calm I was, he was able to calm down a little bit too. I
was omitted into the OR at 11:40 and she was born at 12:22pm. She weighed 8lbs 3oz and she was 21 ½ inches long. She
was born with these huge cheeks that were just so kissable!!
They took us from the OR into the recovery room where I had
to wait for some feeling to come into my legs before they let me go into my
hospital room. I got to hold her the whole time and Daniel and I just sat there
and stared at her and kept saying how perfect she was. We were so in love with
her right away.
Us in recovery and our first picture together!
After recovery they took her back to the newborn nursery to
give her a bath and run normal newborn tests before they gave her back to me. I
got back to my room and was SO thirsty since I wasn't able to eat or drink
anything since midnight the previous night. I was so incredibly thirsty… the
nurse gave me a HUGE cup of iced juice and told me to drink it slowly…. I
should have listened a little more carefully.
I did drink it slow, but I guess not slow enough and right after I
finished it, it came right back up! She gave me another cup full and this time
I really listened to her so I wouldn't get sick again….. I must have drank 4 of
those huge cups in about 2 hours’ time… Daniel’s family came to visit shortly
after we were out of recovery, mom and dad were there as well.. However they
took forever for them to bring Emma back to me! It was like almost two hours
before I got her back from the newborn nursery, but once we got her back I had
her the rest of the time if I wanted to. She passed all her tests with flying
colors!
Family and Emma...
My mama- Emma's Gigi
My daddy- Emma's Grandpa
Daniel's Dad- Emma's Grandpa
The first few days of us together:
The only people that came to visit that day were Daniel’s
family and mine, we decided it was important to just have immediate family
there right away and have friends come a little bit later. More of my friends
came the next day. I didn't get much sleep between all of the machines I was
hooked up to, the nurses coming in to check my vitals every hour and then them
bringing Emma in from the nursery to nurse every 3 hours…. We decided to let
the nursery take her the nights we were in the hospital so that we could get
some sleep… I felt better sleeping while she was being watched by the nurses
since she was still so little and fragile. I didn't sleep still; I just missed
her and wanted her with me. I don’t think I slept for a full 3 days. I finally
got some shut eye the day before we left the hospital, I just napped while mom
and dad and Dan watched TV in the room and watched Emma… I felt better knowing
she was in the room with us and being watched at the same time while I slept.
We were supposed to be discharged on Tuesday morning around
10am, but they started to get concerned about Emma’s jaundice levels. She had
already lost almost 12% of her birth weight and they started to get concerned
that she wasn’t eating enough. We were given the choice to supplement with
formula until I was able to produce enough milk to make sure she was getting
enough to eat. They weren’t 100% comfortable with discharging her until they
talked to her doctor to make sure that her jaundice levels weren’t anything to
be concerned about. Her pediatrician agreed to discharge her that day around
1pm with the condition that we come in the next day to her office so that she
can give her a weight check.
Leaving the hospital was very emotional for me. I was so
protective of her and I was so scared that she was cold since it was her first
time ever outside, it was the first time she was ever in her car seat and she
was so tiny it didn't look like she was really supported enough. She was crying
so hard when we were trying to get her into the car, it was cold and windy and
I knew she was cold because I was cold.. I started crying because I was so
hormonal and I was so worried about her, I was a wreck. I was a wreck for
pretty much the next two weeks after leaving the hospital. People tell you
about postpartum depression, but I didn't know my anxiety would be so bad. I
felt like I had so much to lose now that I had a child to protect that I loved
so much, I just wanted to curl up in the house to prevent anything from
happening to her. I still get weird when other people want to hold her so much,
I feel like I want to hold her at all times and I miss her when I don’t get to
hold her. The hormones are subsiding for now and I don’t feel as anxious
anymore, thank God! That was not easy to deal with. Of course I had to deal
with the hormones while I had to say goodbye to mom and dad, as if that isn't already hard enough. Their time was so short here and since I was so busy with
Emma, I didn't even get any pictures with them! I got some pictures of them
holding Emma, but that is about it.
Here is us leaving the hospital!
The first night she was home with us from the hospital, she
was up every hour on the hour and I was so tired! All she wanted to do was feed
and feed and I wasn't producing enough milk, so she wasn't ever getting full. I
was so scared that all her nights home were going to be like that and I was
going to go crazy! She was up feeding and at her doctor’s appointment the next
day they weighed her and she gained 3oz in one day! So I guess the feeding paid
off. However, her doctor did notice that her eyes were starting to yellow
meaning that the jaundice wasn't going away, it was getting worse. I was so
scared she was going to have to be put back in the hospital and go under the
lights. They had us drive to the lab to get her blood taken, I cried almost the
whole way there. I was scared she was going to cry during the heel prick, she didn't though! She did cry at the end when they were trying to collect the
blood only because she was hungry. Her levels had gone down since the hospital
and she didn't have to be looked at anymore. The doctor told me that once my
milk started to come in that she would poop out the jaundice and the yellow
would start to go away. It did eventually come in and she was feeding like a
champ after that! I was so relieved.
Things are so different now with a newborn in the house, my
entire life is turned around and my every minute is devoted to her. I love it
though. She is absolutely perfect and I feel so blessed to have her be my
daughter. She is so beautiful! Right now she has dark blonde hair and blue
eyes, but those are said to change within the first few weeks of life, so we’ll
see what color they turn out to be later! Daniel has been helping me so much
with the diaper changes and the feedings as well. He doesn't get up in the
middle of the night with her unless he doesn't have to work the next day. I
figured since I am off I can get up with her and I can sleep in a little in the
mornings. I’m feeling almost back to 100% too! The procedure was easy peasy and
I was up and walking that night. I felt really good and I have been off of my
pain meds since about a week after we got home.
We also got her newborn photo shoot under our belt already and the announcements have been sent out! Here are a few of my faves from her newborn shoot!
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